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Dear Friends

from A Graveyard In My Head by Bradley Ryan

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lyrics

Some things are better left unsaid
But if I never said a word, I’d most likely go insane
Whether it’s from everything I have to say
The many observations I make in any given day
Or the unnerving silence building in my head
There’s just so much that I need to get off my chest
Here’s hoping someone will listen to me
Maybe I can close my eyes for once in my life
And get a night of peace so I can truly rest
My tired eyes that have seen so much within the last year
I’ve been abandoned by my closest friends
I’ve lost a lover that meant the world to me
I’ve never been sure if it’s just my imagination
Or if I could use some kind of change in scenery
Even if it just happens to be within my state of mind

I’m aware that I’ve been so distant and bitter
Go ahead and tell me something I don’t already know
I’m sorry that was kind of rude
I’ve discovered a temper I never knew I had
And my patience has been getting thinner and thinner
For a long time, I didn’t know if I had any left
I’ve just been so sick of people leaving and things changing
Especially when I never asked for it
And never wanted things to change
I never thought I’d lose any of my closest friends
I never thought I’d lose the girl that meant the most to me
I never thought things would change within the blink of an eye
I’m not the same person I was a year ago
I was forced to grow up when I thought I had it all
I was forced to look reality dead in the eyes
And watch as it took away the things that mattered most
Now they’re just things that I left behind

I’ve learned so many things over this last year
I went from feeling bitter to feeling so much better
But I couldn’t have done it without you
I’ve lost a lot of friends in the last couple of years
If we’re being honest, it still kind of hurts
I don’t let it get the best of me anymore
Because for every friend that’s abandoned me
There’s another that never let go
It took so long to realize that I was never alone
For that I’m truly thankful
You’ve made me the person I am today
And I don’t know where I’d be without you
I’m sorry if we ever lost touch
But just know that you’re still in my thoughts
You’re like brothers and sisters to me

I wish I would realized all of this much sooner
But life has a funny way of working out sometimes
I’m living in a much better state of mind now
I love the view outside my tired eyes
Instead of being so distant towards everyone
I’m stopping to admire my internal scenery
We accept the love we think we deserve
And now I know that I deserve the absolute best
When I stare at myself in the mirror
I’m finally happy with the person I see
Make no mistake, I still have many scars
That run straight through my chest
But I’ve been learning to live with them
I’ve looked reality dead in the face and said,
“I’m not afraid anymore of the things I can’t change
I’m moving on from the things I left behind
Only to focus on the things that matter most
And the people that never left my side in the first place”

credits

from A Graveyard In My Head, released May 20, 2016

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